My (not so) Anonymous Life

November 30, 2009

You

Filed under: others — shitjusthappens @ 1:56 am
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You’re quite a guy. You’re half a man and half a boy, quite the best mix of both. I don’t mind about it at all. You’re just the one who fits perfect into my dreams and the hardest I try to forget you, the world just proofs me we belong together. There’s no such meaning in my life without you in it.

November 17, 2009

All About A Choice… Cause I’ve Made Mine.

Filed under: life — shitjusthappens @ 4:47 pm
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Not gonna tell you not to read this. You should, you really do.

I tried, I swear I tried the hardest to get to you. I tried to figure out what would be the girl of your dreams like but no, I’m not gonna change. I’m still myself, maybe even more myself than never, I’ve got this point. And I’m proud – for me. You should be too.

I don’t know how much you know or how much you think you know about my feelings. Even when I had told you everything I ever felt, you never made it easier. You never showed me you really knew, what makes me feel like a stupid jerk who used all of her courage for nothing. Yeah, courage, I needed a lot of that.

But I’m writing because I give up. I tried before and maybe I won’t get that right now. But we are way too different. Things we talked about yesterday, things you said which I don’t believe in. Maybe that’s the point. I know it doesn’t work. Even if you believe a year is enough to forget someone who’s far… I know it isn’t. I’ve tried this before. Here’s the tip: it REALLY NEVER WORKS, just make it worse. Until you find another one or you get so sick of waiting for true love you give up everything about your heart and goes back to that cold person you were before. And I really wish I can go back for that.

Thanks for the memories. The memories that have been hurting me for over a year.

You make me cry, you make me insane, you make me different. But not anymore.

 

I guess this is the end.

November 4, 2009

All About Choices

Filed under: worries — shitjusthappens @ 7:51 pm
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Well, right. Choices. They’re so many, specially on my age – 18, whoever asks. But some choices are made up in my head, but still depends on people to get real. (more…)

November 3, 2009

Someday

Filed under: others — shitjusthappens @ 1:39 am
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As the sun goes down, we will be together: we’ll lay under the moonlight and watch its shadows during the whole night, counting all the stars up there and then, when the morning starts, you’ll kiss me and I’ll know I’ll be forever yours.

 

My hopes are way too high you could never ever imagine.

October 19, 2009

A Message Not To Be Read

Filed under: worries — shitjusthappens @ 4:09 am
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I really don’t need to say again you SHOULDN’T read this, right? Yeah, you know who you are. (more…)

October 12, 2009

My Very Deepest Secrets

Filed under: life — shitjusthappens @ 1:42 am
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You. Yeah, you, you know who you are. I suggest you don’t read this or maybe I could hurt your feelings.

(more…)

August 5, 2009

Guys

Filed under: worries — shitjusthappens @ 11:10 pm
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Hello, dudes! Here’s something I’ve been thinking about.

A few days ago, me and some friends were talking about love, the perfect boy/girlfriend etc. Well, in my opinion, the perfect one is that who likes you just the way you are and who you like the same way. By the way, before being lovers, we should be nice friends and trust each other.

But nobody said it’s easy to find true love – and even if someone has done, it’s a lie. Some are lucky – and less than 1% of the whole world. Some keep waiting. For so long. Just like me.

I’ve already been in love. I am in love. But only once I was loved back and it’s over now. But I’m happy when I say I’ve got the best friend in the whole world, who is still far from me when talking about distance, but is so close when talking about feeling. He fights when I’m wrong, hugs me when I’m right… laughes when I’m funny. However it is, it’s always perfect. I can get mad, but it just goes away when he cames back to me.

Whatever. What I mean is that I’m not that beautiful neighter am too sexy for my shirt LOL but I’m a simple girl. A smart one. If I don’t have someone, doesn’t mean I don’t want someone, but I don’t need a lot of boys like sharks around me. Don’t want a lot of guys falling at my feet. I just wanted someone who I love loving me. That’s all I wish. No need to come in a white horse, unless he’s a prince and wants it. I just want somebody who loves me like I am, while he’s being himself.

xx

C.

July 29, 2009

Personality Crisis

Filed under: life,worries — shitjusthappens @ 12:10 am
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I gotta look like a SO problematic person. But I don’t mind, that’s none of ANYBODY’s business, then it’s still my own problems. If it matters to you, imagine it’s just another of those boring books about how to act. Or not, but the truth is things are getting a little outta place. Or am I losing myself? Don’t matter.

But I’m having a serious problem with my own personality. It’s calling me to act and fight for what I want, as I always did, but the person “me” is telling me not to do anything, just keep it on me and forget the rest. Ha, it seems easy but BELIEVE ME, it sucks when you’re fighting inside.

And just for you to know, YOU BOY, listen to me.

UNLESS FOR NOW, I’M STILL FIGHTING TO GET YOU. UNTIL I GET THAT TIRED TO ACT LIKE A FOOL (AS I’M DOING RIGHT NOW) AND GIVE UP, I’LL KEEP FIGHTING. MAYBE I’M A GOOD FRIEND, BUT THAT’S DEFINITELY NOT HALF OF WHAT I WANNA BE.
—————-

“She was scared, unprepared, lost in the dark. Falling apart, I can survive with you by my side.”
Now playing: Demi Lovato – Two Worlds Collide
via FoxyTunes

May 27, 2009

Bitter

Filed under: life — shitjusthappens @ 4:16 am
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I had a bitter week. I mean, the last one. But this one NOTHING can make it bad. Anyway, I’m talk about bitterness.

Some years ago, I used to be so bitter. I was a cold person until something happen to change it.

I knew a guy at the Internet and we become friends. Nice friends. Close friends. Closer friends. The closest ones. And I kinda fell in love, but my “fall in love” was a lot different those days than it’s today – thanks to him.

I was 13. He fell in love and asked me to be his girlfriend. I agreed, but I wasn’t THAT into him. He used to do anything so it could work out – but I didn’t even try much. I was happy to say ‘I have a boyfriend!’, but I didn’t care much. But nothing is always a bed of roses, so he should have been tired of my indifference so he broke up. Then, I felt bad a lot. It changed myself.

I started to care more about people who I love. I started to be a lot worried if they were okay. I started to love that guy in a different way, a stronger way. I really loved him after losing him. We got together again, but it was never the same: I started to care and he didn’t anymore. So it wasn’t working out again and we broke up. Forever. But we’re still best friends.

And I changed a lot because of this special fact in my life. It changed who I was and now I’m a better person – but sometimes it hurts me because now I try to trust everybody, even when I have a great chance to fail.

But you know what? I LOVE who I am and who wants to love me needs to love exactly this person.

Have a great week, guys, I’m sure mine is going to be.

May 20, 2009

Betrayed

Filed under: life,poetry — shitjusthappens @ 3:48 pm
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Betrayed – as I’ve been:
I’m lost and I can’t seem
To see why it’s happening;
Couldn’t see it changing.

Lost in tragedy and in vain,
Can’t feel nothing but the pain
That means to suck all the good memories
We had such a nice stories.

Now I do nothing but I cry
And I want to stop and I still try
But nothing’s as worst as this:
I’ve been betrayed and it is

So much more than I can take,
So I decided it to break.
Don’t mind about cynicism
Neighter about your me-ism:

I’m going to forget ‘us’
And stay beside who I can trust.
No more betrayals, no more tears,
I won’t trust anymore, so I won’t fear.

—————-
Now playing: Adele – Daydreamer
via FoxyTunes

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